2007 Christmas Un-letter

I’m not sending out Christmas cards this year.

Normally I always send them out with a cute picture of all the kids. I also include a letter updating family and friends on what has happened this year with all the kids and with our family.

I’ve been trying to think of a way to do that letter without it being either just horribly awkward OR without lying through my teeth. I can’t figure out how to do it.

So, I’ve decided not to.

But, just for kicks, here is what my typical Christmas letter would look like this year IF I wrote one:



MERRY CHRISTMAS 2007 FROM THE WARNER FAMILY!

We would like to wish you a blessed Christmas Season and a very Happy New Year! We hope that this letter finds you and your family in good health and high spirits.

This has been a strange and challenging year. But first, the good news:

We have a new baby girl! Monkey5 was born on in January. She was induced 3 weeks early due to complications, but came out perfect and healthy. We are delighted that we’ve been blessed with her!

In other news this year, I [CatholicMama] started the year in the hospital with Pregnancy complications [High Blood Pressure and then Preeclampsia]. After a few weeks of hospitalization, and the most heinous medical mismanagement imaginable, I suffered an Eclamptic Seizure and almost died. Miraculously I lived. Monkey5 almost died as well at the end of the 44 hour labor and spent the first 6 hours of her life in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit for a hole in her heart [which miraculously healed on its own, Praise God!].

The year went downhill from there. :)

I suffered brain damage after the Seizure, similar to what Stroke victims suffer. I could not read, write, type, drive, remember names, numbers, locations, or the names of common objects. I suffered “cortical blindness” for several days after delivery, thankfully my full vision returned [miraculously?]. After about 3 months, my brain began to heal, also miraculously. Now, my only lingering damage is a tendency to forget common words or switch out words without realizing it. [As in “Please throw the toys in the trash” instead of “Please throw the toys in the toy box”]. This has resulted in some interesting situations where her children actually *obeyed* what I said and caused havoc because it isn’t what I thought I said. There is much humor to be found there however. LOL!

Midsummer, the MonkeyDaddy suffered a massive break down. He was diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder in the aftermath of almost losing his wife and baby in January. He spent a week in the hospital and then came home, seeming to be doing much better. But, while he was in the hospital, he was started on a powerful drug that actually changed his personality, much for the worse.

Two weeks after he came home from the hospital, he had a complete personality change and a week after that he moved out, abandoned the family, and demanded a divorce [from a marriage that had, to that point, been a very happy, close one!]. He was really, really mean while he was gone and did really terrible things.

Two months of suffering and pain followed that, in which I tried to figure out how to be a single mother to 5 young children. It was a time period of massive Grace – from a miraculous “Consolation of the Lord” to the amazing people who chose to help in every imaginable way. I developed new respect for my friends and members of my Church and Homeschool Group, who absolutely lived out the teachings of Christ in very tangible ways.

It was *amazing* from the standpoint of finding out just HOW incredibly helpful and supportive my family was though – they stood by me and helped me in every conceivable way. They rock!

It was also interesting from the standpoint of who chose NOT to help at all. It was shocking that family members on the other side chose to do *nothing* to help.

Then the MonkeyDaddy went off [on a whim] of the horrible drug that made him evil and he became “himself” again and wanted to come home [another miraculous Grace from God]. I decided to swallow all my pride and reconcile – definitely miraculous and only possible through the tremendous Grace of God.

He started Lithium in November and it seems to be a “miracle drug” for him – he is more stable and happy than he has been in 10 years. It has been nice to see the funny, charming, and wonderful man I married again. In December he moved home. Things are very hopeful right now, which seems totally surreal after the year we’ve had!

In other news:

Monkey1 turned 9 this year and has continued to be an amazingly brilliant and sweet kid. She is in third grade in our Homeschool. She reads like a maniac – reading at least one book per day most days. She reads fiction [Nancy Drew and the American Girl series being her favorites], but she also reads anything else she can get her hands on – she read her massive History text cover to cover for fun, she reads science books, biographies… ingredient lists, directions, and cereal boxes… LOL! She has excelled tremendously in Choir at Church and the Choir Director has recommended private voice lessons for her because she really is gifted. She has continued to play Homeschool Soccer and to be active in Little Flowers. She has also started puberty this year, which has been interesting and amazing to see.

Monkey2 turned 6 this year. He is in first grade in our Homeschool. He continues to be an amazing “fix it” guy – he is definitely an engineer in the making. He can figure out any electronic device [which is good for his mom, because he often has to help me operate her phone, camera, GPS, etc]. He draws blue prints of buildings and schematics of different air, water, and space craft. He also sings in the choir and has a beautiful voice. He loves soccer and Little Saints. He also enjoyed going camping with his God father and God brothers a couple of times this year. He remains obsessed with Star Wars and Super Heroes. He really, really wanted our new baby to be a boy, but he seems now to have made peace with being the only little man in our home, surrounded by sisters. He will make a great husband or priest one day. 

Monkey3 turned 4 this year. She is in preschool at our Church 4 days a week. [The same preschool her older siblings also attended]. She is a teacher favorite and is SO sweet and helpful! She continues to be an utter fire-cracker of personality and is so intelligent and hard working [a definite asset!]. She is very energetic and extremely strong [her nickname is “The Ant” because she is tiny and can literally lift and carry her own body weight]. She loves playing Star Wars and Super Heroes with her brother, and can keep up with ANYONE, but she also enjoys wearing pretty dresses and being a total “princess”. She’s a very well rounded kid! She also plays Homeschool Soccer and is involved with Little Saints and can’t wait to sing in the choir.

Monkey4 turned 2 this year, and she was two like no other kid we have! She is intensely focused and extremely intelligent. She got into the most amazing array of “situations”. She can UN-baby proof anything, she can get into any secured space, she can disassemble any possession, she can deconstruct any object. She is a *pure* scientist at her deepest level. It was both extremely fascinating and totally frustrating to witness. It will serve her well when she gets older, we just hope we survive her childhood! Lately she is coming out of that “Path of Destruction” thing and is really maturing and coming in to her own. She has a fantastic, sweet, funny, loving personality. She has been extremely kind to “her” baby and is a great big sister.

Monkey5, the new baby, is precious! She started off life with 3 months of colic. She morphed into a very high needs baby who had to be held 24/7 from birth. She spent the first 6 months of her life in a sling or baby bjorn on her mom and the last 5 months of her life in a backpack on her mother’s back. But as long as she is being held, she is a very happy, easy going baby. She had/has terrible stranger anxiety and only wants to be held by her mother or father and a couple of other special people – she’s VERY upset by anyone else trying to hold her or get too close to her. She is extremely alert and curious and shows every sign of being just as intelligent and sweet as her older siblings. She is crawling everywhere now and is just starting to realize she can get in to things and cause chaos!

The MonkeyDaddy is still working in the IT department of the same bank he has worked at for the last 3.5 years.

I have continued to teach Lamaze at the same hospital where I have been employed for the last 8.5 years and I’m still enjoying it a great deal. My volunteer time has dwindled to almost nil, but I still enjoy helping coordinate things for the homeschool group and being room mom for Monkey3’s preschool class.

I got a new God Son this year too! He was baptized in May and is a precious, handsome little man. I am so honored to be his God Mother! Now I have 4 God children - two girls and two boys. I am really happy to be able to help them on their way to Heaven!

We also adopted two dogs this year. The first is “Sage”, a pure bred 5 year old collie from St. Francis Collie Rescue. She is beautiful, but very “aloof”. Like all great Southern Dams, her manners are impeccable. But, she’s not very affectionate and seems to consider herself far above it all. The second dog, on the other hand, is “Tyr”. He is a 2 year old mutt – lab and husky mix with a little Shar Pei thrown in there. He is an all around great dog. We had some challenges in the beginning with teaching him manners, but he has turned out to be the best dog – very affectionate, playful, obedient, and fun! The kids have LOVED having dogs!

We hope this year has been a wonderful one for you and your family! May your 2008 be filled with God’s abundant Blessings and Love!

The Monkey House


Now, honestly, I started writing this all kind of tongue in cheek, because it really has been a terrible year. But what struck me as I wrote is how many Miracles we had this year – how much Grace poured down on our heads.

In retrospect, instead of remembering 2007 as the worst year of my life [which I have to say, it was], I think I should remember it as the year of Miracles and tremendous Blessings from the Lord.

Praise God indeed!